A friend introduced him to Kylie Ringo, a sorority sister at Tarleton State University in Stephenville, Texas. Kylie remembers that when she and Cade met, she remembers it was her “love at first sight.”
A month after college graduation, Kylie and Cade got married in Marble Falls, Texas. We are both proud to be from Texas. Kylie’s family has lived there for generations, with Cade’s ancestors being called the “Old Three Hundreds” of Texas in his 1800s by Steven Austin, one of the first families to settle in the area. I’m one of the
At the time, the Despines were anti-abortionists.
“I was your typical pro-life Texan,” Kylie, 29, told CNN in a recent interview.
“I was raised in Central Texas by Republican parents and grandparents,” said Cade, 31. “It’s 100 percent pro-life.”
A year after their marriage, Kylie miscarried at 16 weeks and was hospitalized with severe complications including blood clots and infections. It was her one of three miscarriages she had early in her marriage.
“I realized that pregnancy can be dangerous,” she said. She “made me think of my sisters, so if I had to go through something like that, I wanted to give them a choice.”
When restrictive anti-abortion laws went into effect in Texas last September, Kylie took to Facebook urging people to contact her elected representatives to defend abortion rights.
In November, Kylie and Cade were overjoyed to find out she was pregnant. Full of hope, they posted an ultrasound photo and a gender revealing video of a blue confetti-firing cannon. They named the boy Finley.
About three months later, Mr. Finley was found to have heart, lung, brain, kidney, and genetic defects, and was either stillborn or died within minutes of birth. Carrying him to full term puts Kylie at a higher risk of serious pregnancy complications such as blood clots, pre-eclampsia and cancer.
Still, they were unable to get an abortion in Texas and fled to New Mexico.
“I’ve never felt so betrayed by a place I used to be proud of,” Kylie said tearfully.
“How could you be so cruel to pass a law that you know hurts women and makes them give birth to babies in pain?” she added. “How humane is it? How does it save someone?”
CNN has emailed the Texas legislators who created or sponsored the state’s anti-abortion law. No one answered CNN’s question.
severe prognosis for the baby
When Kylie and Cade found out she was pregnant, they desperately wanted a “sticky baby,” a pregnancy that lasted after she had three miscarriages.
One doctor said, “Some of these problems can be fixed, but not all of them together.”
But doctors said they couldn’t offer an abortion in Texas. She said the only option to get one was to travel out of state.
risking kylie’s life
Staying pregnant with Finley could have put Kylie’s life in danger.
Kylie said she considered risking her own life to carry Finley to term.
“Me [wanted] Say goodbye,” she said. [wanted] A chance to hug him. ”
But she figured Finley was going to have trouble breathing.
“He’s going to choke to death, and I’m going to watch him do it,” she said.
Cade had only one option. It didn’t make sense for Cade to risk her wife’s life to have a baby who was sure to die soon.
Cade told Kylie, “I stand by whatever decision you make, but I really don’t want to lose both of you,” Kylie remembers.
DeSpains didn’t have enough money.Kade said her salary had been garnished at work because she had taken too many sick days..Cade would be a widow at 30 if she didn’t have an abortion. My relatives relented when I said I could be.
Cade said he doesn’t like asking for money, but “My job as a husband is to protect and love my wife. If I don’t fight to keep her here, I will fail.” did”.
Kylie had an abortion in March when she was 19 weeks pregnant.
“I’m still very angry and hurt.”
Legislators didn’t answer CNN’s questions about Kylie’s case, but the President of Texas’ Rights to Life did.
John Seago said, “Texas law is very clear about the circumstances under which an abortion can be performed,” adding, “What happened?” [Kailee] And her doctor’s response was a complete misrepresentation of the law. And this should never have happened. ”
“They don’t exactly describe the circumstances under which they can offer an abortion,” Keith said.
According to Kylie, her doctor told her that she could only have an abortion if she was in imminent danger of death. ”
Penalties can be severe if doctors are found to be breaking the law. You can face hefty fines, loss of your medical license, and even life imprisonment.
In addition, citizens can sue doctors they believe to have performed illegal abortions and win a $10,000 reward. Even if the citizen is wrong and the doctor wins the lawsuit, Texas law specifically prohibits doctors from recovering costs from plaintiffs, so the doctor must pay his own legal costs.
“Facing the possibility of becoming a felony and facing a life sentence for just trying to care for a patient is terrifying and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t thinking of leaving the state,” Leah said. Dr Tatum said. A spokesperson for the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, who has a practice in Austin, Texas, and has treated patients in situations similar to Kylie’s since the Texas abortion ban was passed.
Kylie says the last time she saw her obstetrician, she advised her not to get pregnant in Texas.
“She said, ‘This is not safe,'” recalls Kylie. “She said, look at me. If you get pregnant in Texas and have complications, I want you to understand that I can’t intervene until I can prove you’re going to die.”
The Despines are considering leaving Texas, but say leaving work and family will be difficult.
Kylie said she’s sharing their stories in hopes of raising awareness so that “a story like mine can change the perspective of enough voters.”
CNN’s Nadia Kounang and John Bonifield contributed to this report.